A man dies and goes to heaven. Looking around he notices there are clocks everywhere. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."

"Incredible", said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Bush's clock?" the man asked.
St. Peter replied "It's in Jesus's office: He's using it as a ceiling fan."